Slice
10-28-2007, 03:53 PM
James: Hold it steady, you idiot!
Thomas: Listen, David, if you wanna hang with the big boys, you’ve got to be able to handle a camera.
David: Yeah, yeah, fine, it’s steady.
James looks directly into the camera.
James: Ok good. Hi! I’m WcE’s James Whitman, and this weekend, I’ll be facing Ken Forte at WcE’s Halloween Bash at the Rose Garden in Portland Oregon. And I would just like to give you all a bit more info on the who, the what and the where, and in the process of doing so hopefully gain a bit more insight myself. Joining me on this magical journey will be my fellow JESTers; Eddie Sanchez, Scott Jones and Thomas Williams.
Eddie, Scott and Thomas walk into view and smile and hold their thumbs up. A big hand passes in front of the camera.
James: Oh right, and my cousin David will be the cameraman.
David(Off-Screen): Thank you!
James: First, we’re going to address the “who”.
The camera turns to static and returns to normal, we now see footage of Ken Forte smacking Samson across the back and sending him to the mat. We see various other similar pieces of footage until the scene cuts to James sitting at a desk, wearing reading glasses and looking at a piece of paper.
James: WHO am I facing at the Halloween Bash? Well, Ken Forte. He is known as the World’s Most Dangerous man, and has so much proof to back it up that nobody is going to even try and argue that fact.
The camera turns and we see Thomas, Scott and Eddie sitting at little desks as if they were in a classroom. Thomas raises his hand.
James: Yes Thomas?
Thomas: Can Iiii argue that fact?
James: Well you could try, but I mean come on, Forte basically dismantled you last week.
Thomas: Lies.
James: Dude, you got carried away on a stretcher!
Thomas: Untrue.
James: DUDE! I was WITH you in the AMBULANCE!
Thomas: I would like for you to acknowledge the source of your allegations, sir.
James sighs, and then looks at the camera.
James: Well look at the guy, he’s bandaged up and has dark sunglasses on, I rest my case. Even though this isn’t a courtroom. Hell, this isn’t even a classroom. Wait, what the hell are we doing here?
Scott: Where ARE we?
Suddenly we hear a door burst open and the camera turns to the door, we see three men barge in with a few policemen and screaming “that guy with the camera, he’s the-”, the rest is unintelligible. The camera shakes around wildly before turning to static.
The screen opens back in front of a car parked in a parking lot, Scott and Eddie are lying on the hood and eating French fries as Thomas is sitting inside the car and writing. James is in front of the car looking at David who’s behind the camera.
James: Dude, next time, TELL us if we’re trespassing.
David (off-camera): Will do.
James: Anyways, where was I? Oh right, the Who.
Eddie jumps off the hood and runs to James.
Eddie: YOU GOT US TICKETS TO SEE THE WHO?! NO WAY!
Scott runs over as well.
Scott (singing): PEOPLE TRY TO PUT US D-D-DOWN!
Eddie gets over to James’ right as Scott is on James’ left, and they both start moshing and pushing James about.
Eddie (singing): MY GENERATIOOOON!
James pushes them both away.
James: STOP IT! Now where was I? Oh yeah, the Who.
Scott: Déjà vu, dude.
Eddie: Who, Déjà vu, dude… What, are you guys poets or something?
Everyone gets confused looks on their faces.
James: ANYWAY, I was talking about Ken Forte. We know he’s one hell of a wrestler with an insane track record, having shown feats of endurance that would make Everest-climbers cringe. However, there’s ONE thing he doesn’t have.
Eddie: That’s right, James. And that thing is the ALL NEW JESTERS SHIRT!
Scott tosses a shirt to Eddie and he shows it to the camera;
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g171/Slicerino/FanShirt.jpg
James: That’s right, straight from that wacky scene in our movie comes this shirt featuring Tiffany JESTing around!
Scott: Proclaim your JESTers fandom and buy one now!
Thomas: The proceeds of this shirt go to a good cause, too.
James: Yep, we’ll be spending every single nickel we get off it on booze and energy drinks.
David (off-screen): Uh, guys? The promo?
James: Oh, right.
James clears his throat.
James: I have held victories over numerous legends, as well as legends-in-the-making. Ken Forte has the same thing going for him. How can I be confident that I can defeat the world’s most dangerous man? Well, I can’t. I can’t choose to win. But I choose to refuse to lose, and that’s what really matters. I will either win that title or die trying.
Thomas: Did he say try dying?
Eddie: What? We’re buying ties now? Why would we-
James sighs as he walks up the camera and does the sign for David to cut. We see static, and then the screen returns to normal once again. This time, the JESTers are sitting in a room; it seems to belong to one of them as it is filled with JESTers posters and memorabilia as well as JEST Kiddin’ Inc. stuff.
James: The what. In this case, we have various “what”s. First off, what will happen that includes me and Ken Forte? A one-on-one match up for the WCE world heavyweight title.
Thomas walks up to James dressed as a “nerd”; wearing weird glasses and a small shirt with a pocket protector.
Thomas: Oeh oeh! But Mr. Trap, how can a lame, boring old normal match possibly be important?
James looks at Thomas, then at the camera, then back at Thomas. He then shakes his head and looks back at the camera.
James: Sadly, this is not an isolated question. We’ve gotten many questions from fans asking us to participate in more gimmick matches.
Eddie: Indeed. A lot of people nowadays want more than just grappling.
James: Sad, but true. We had a chart, but Scott used it to wipe his nose when he was drunk.
Scott: HEY! I was tipsy.
James: Anyway, look at this footage.
The screen turns black, and we see, written in white; “September 15th, 2004. Forsaken.”
James talks as we see footage of the final match of that evening.
James: The first ever PPV main event in WCE version 2’s history. A standard match. Jamie Noxx versus the Executioner. As you can see, both men are giving it their all. This is clearly not just about winning. This is about being a part of something bigger.
The screen turns to black again, and this time written in white we see “September 10th, 2005. Night of Champions II.”
The screen is still black but we can hear the commentator’s voices…
“Belmont is lucky he had his wits about him”….. “Another note about these two, they’re both so talented in the ring…Both men have a real fluent style and execute difficult moves with ease, It’s really a beautiful spectacle when these two enter the ring…”
“Belmont going up top…this could be risky!... Get Up Kenny!... We might be ready for a missile dropkick!”
Suddenly, the screen goes completely and almost blindingly white, and we see Adam Belmont jumping off the top rope and getting hit with a massive Knock Out Kick by none other than Ken Forte!
James: That’s right; this standard match was Adam Belmont versus Ken Forte. As you can see, there’s nothing average about the action in the ring.
The screen goes back to James and the others in the room.
James: Standard is just a reference point. Almost every single match in WCE history has been amazing. Our standard equals amazing.
Eddie: Correct. So I hope you all understand what the WHAT is now.
Thomas: Wait, what about “what” they’re fighting for?
James: Oh, right.
The screen cuts to a picture of the WCE World Heavyweight title.
James: The WcE title has been held by the best of the best. The top wrestlers not only in our company, but in the world. And I was lucky enough to have been in that list.
Thomas: Until Forte took that away from you.
Eddie and Scott gasp, and James gets a vacant look on his face. The screen cuts to;
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g171/Slicerino/Clown.jpg
It then cuts to the JESTers leaning against a wall and eating ice cream.
James: That always cheers me up.
Eddie: Yeah, I dunno how you can stand that flavor though.
Scott: Right, I mean, don’t get me wrong, beer rules, but not in dairy products.
Thomas: Exactly. I like my dairy pure and untouched. Even though it had to go through many people to get to the point it is.
The other three JESTers look at each other, then back at Thomas.
James, Eddie, and Scott: THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!
Thomas: You guys are so juvenile.
Thomas walks away shaking his head and licking his ice cream.
James: Oh well. Anyways, we’re here to discuss just that; the “where”.
Scott: Correct-o-mundo, Trappy, this here’s the Rose Garden Arena in Portland, Oregon.
The camera pans out to reveal the Arena behind the JESTers.
James: This Arena has seen a lot of action, but none of it crazy enough to even compare to WCE’s action.
The camera turns to static and now the JESTers are inside the arena, sitting in the ring.
James: And this is exactly WHERE the action will happen.
Thomas: Another “where” is also HERE; The entire PPV.
James: Confusing, but true. WCE Halloween Bash 2007. The beginning of the road for the future new IC champ, a grudge match between two legends…
Thomas: An Xtreme match for the title, where I will be giving it my all for a chance to hold that gold…
Eddie: A tag team match that will see me and Scott defending our title against two of the toughest SOBs in WCE…
James: And of course, the main event is where I, James DeathTrap Whitman, face off against World’s Most Dangerous man Ken Forte, with the WCE World Heavyweight Title on the line.
Scott: Right. So now that you know the who, the what, and the where... you better be there.
James: Correct, sir. This public service announcement has been brought to you by the JESTers. See ya at the bash!
The screen fades into
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g171/Slicerino/wceHBppvlogo2.gif
Thomas: Listen, David, if you wanna hang with the big boys, you’ve got to be able to handle a camera.
David: Yeah, yeah, fine, it’s steady.
James looks directly into the camera.
James: Ok good. Hi! I’m WcE’s James Whitman, and this weekend, I’ll be facing Ken Forte at WcE’s Halloween Bash at the Rose Garden in Portland Oregon. And I would just like to give you all a bit more info on the who, the what and the where, and in the process of doing so hopefully gain a bit more insight myself. Joining me on this magical journey will be my fellow JESTers; Eddie Sanchez, Scott Jones and Thomas Williams.
Eddie, Scott and Thomas walk into view and smile and hold their thumbs up. A big hand passes in front of the camera.
James: Oh right, and my cousin David will be the cameraman.
David(Off-Screen): Thank you!
James: First, we’re going to address the “who”.
The camera turns to static and returns to normal, we now see footage of Ken Forte smacking Samson across the back and sending him to the mat. We see various other similar pieces of footage until the scene cuts to James sitting at a desk, wearing reading glasses and looking at a piece of paper.
James: WHO am I facing at the Halloween Bash? Well, Ken Forte. He is known as the World’s Most Dangerous man, and has so much proof to back it up that nobody is going to even try and argue that fact.
The camera turns and we see Thomas, Scott and Eddie sitting at little desks as if they were in a classroom. Thomas raises his hand.
James: Yes Thomas?
Thomas: Can Iiii argue that fact?
James: Well you could try, but I mean come on, Forte basically dismantled you last week.
Thomas: Lies.
James: Dude, you got carried away on a stretcher!
Thomas: Untrue.
James: DUDE! I was WITH you in the AMBULANCE!
Thomas: I would like for you to acknowledge the source of your allegations, sir.
James sighs, and then looks at the camera.
James: Well look at the guy, he’s bandaged up and has dark sunglasses on, I rest my case. Even though this isn’t a courtroom. Hell, this isn’t even a classroom. Wait, what the hell are we doing here?
Scott: Where ARE we?
Suddenly we hear a door burst open and the camera turns to the door, we see three men barge in with a few policemen and screaming “that guy with the camera, he’s the-”, the rest is unintelligible. The camera shakes around wildly before turning to static.
The screen opens back in front of a car parked in a parking lot, Scott and Eddie are lying on the hood and eating French fries as Thomas is sitting inside the car and writing. James is in front of the car looking at David who’s behind the camera.
James: Dude, next time, TELL us if we’re trespassing.
David (off-camera): Will do.
James: Anyways, where was I? Oh right, the Who.
Eddie jumps off the hood and runs to James.
Eddie: YOU GOT US TICKETS TO SEE THE WHO?! NO WAY!
Scott runs over as well.
Scott (singing): PEOPLE TRY TO PUT US D-D-DOWN!
Eddie gets over to James’ right as Scott is on James’ left, and they both start moshing and pushing James about.
Eddie (singing): MY GENERATIOOOON!
James pushes them both away.
James: STOP IT! Now where was I? Oh yeah, the Who.
Scott: Déjà vu, dude.
Eddie: Who, Déjà vu, dude… What, are you guys poets or something?
Everyone gets confused looks on their faces.
James: ANYWAY, I was talking about Ken Forte. We know he’s one hell of a wrestler with an insane track record, having shown feats of endurance that would make Everest-climbers cringe. However, there’s ONE thing he doesn’t have.
Eddie: That’s right, James. And that thing is the ALL NEW JESTERS SHIRT!
Scott tosses a shirt to Eddie and he shows it to the camera;
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g171/Slicerino/FanShirt.jpg
James: That’s right, straight from that wacky scene in our movie comes this shirt featuring Tiffany JESTing around!
Scott: Proclaim your JESTers fandom and buy one now!
Thomas: The proceeds of this shirt go to a good cause, too.
James: Yep, we’ll be spending every single nickel we get off it on booze and energy drinks.
David (off-screen): Uh, guys? The promo?
James: Oh, right.
James clears his throat.
James: I have held victories over numerous legends, as well as legends-in-the-making. Ken Forte has the same thing going for him. How can I be confident that I can defeat the world’s most dangerous man? Well, I can’t. I can’t choose to win. But I choose to refuse to lose, and that’s what really matters. I will either win that title or die trying.
Thomas: Did he say try dying?
Eddie: What? We’re buying ties now? Why would we-
James sighs as he walks up the camera and does the sign for David to cut. We see static, and then the screen returns to normal once again. This time, the JESTers are sitting in a room; it seems to belong to one of them as it is filled with JESTers posters and memorabilia as well as JEST Kiddin’ Inc. stuff.
James: The what. In this case, we have various “what”s. First off, what will happen that includes me and Ken Forte? A one-on-one match up for the WCE world heavyweight title.
Thomas walks up to James dressed as a “nerd”; wearing weird glasses and a small shirt with a pocket protector.
Thomas: Oeh oeh! But Mr. Trap, how can a lame, boring old normal match possibly be important?
James looks at Thomas, then at the camera, then back at Thomas. He then shakes his head and looks back at the camera.
James: Sadly, this is not an isolated question. We’ve gotten many questions from fans asking us to participate in more gimmick matches.
Eddie: Indeed. A lot of people nowadays want more than just grappling.
James: Sad, but true. We had a chart, but Scott used it to wipe his nose when he was drunk.
Scott: HEY! I was tipsy.
James: Anyway, look at this footage.
The screen turns black, and we see, written in white; “September 15th, 2004. Forsaken.”
James talks as we see footage of the final match of that evening.
James: The first ever PPV main event in WCE version 2’s history. A standard match. Jamie Noxx versus the Executioner. As you can see, both men are giving it their all. This is clearly not just about winning. This is about being a part of something bigger.
The screen turns to black again, and this time written in white we see “September 10th, 2005. Night of Champions II.”
The screen is still black but we can hear the commentator’s voices…
“Belmont is lucky he had his wits about him”….. “Another note about these two, they’re both so talented in the ring…Both men have a real fluent style and execute difficult moves with ease, It’s really a beautiful spectacle when these two enter the ring…”
“Belmont going up top…this could be risky!... Get Up Kenny!... We might be ready for a missile dropkick!”
Suddenly, the screen goes completely and almost blindingly white, and we see Adam Belmont jumping off the top rope and getting hit with a massive Knock Out Kick by none other than Ken Forte!
James: That’s right; this standard match was Adam Belmont versus Ken Forte. As you can see, there’s nothing average about the action in the ring.
The screen goes back to James and the others in the room.
James: Standard is just a reference point. Almost every single match in WCE history has been amazing. Our standard equals amazing.
Eddie: Correct. So I hope you all understand what the WHAT is now.
Thomas: Wait, what about “what” they’re fighting for?
James: Oh, right.
The screen cuts to a picture of the WCE World Heavyweight title.
James: The WcE title has been held by the best of the best. The top wrestlers not only in our company, but in the world. And I was lucky enough to have been in that list.
Thomas: Until Forte took that away from you.
Eddie and Scott gasp, and James gets a vacant look on his face. The screen cuts to;
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g171/Slicerino/Clown.jpg
It then cuts to the JESTers leaning against a wall and eating ice cream.
James: That always cheers me up.
Eddie: Yeah, I dunno how you can stand that flavor though.
Scott: Right, I mean, don’t get me wrong, beer rules, but not in dairy products.
Thomas: Exactly. I like my dairy pure and untouched. Even though it had to go through many people to get to the point it is.
The other three JESTers look at each other, then back at Thomas.
James, Eddie, and Scott: THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!
Thomas: You guys are so juvenile.
Thomas walks away shaking his head and licking his ice cream.
James: Oh well. Anyways, we’re here to discuss just that; the “where”.
Scott: Correct-o-mundo, Trappy, this here’s the Rose Garden Arena in Portland, Oregon.
The camera pans out to reveal the Arena behind the JESTers.
James: This Arena has seen a lot of action, but none of it crazy enough to even compare to WCE’s action.
The camera turns to static and now the JESTers are inside the arena, sitting in the ring.
James: And this is exactly WHERE the action will happen.
Thomas: Another “where” is also HERE; The entire PPV.
James: Confusing, but true. WCE Halloween Bash 2007. The beginning of the road for the future new IC champ, a grudge match between two legends…
Thomas: An Xtreme match for the title, where I will be giving it my all for a chance to hold that gold…
Eddie: A tag team match that will see me and Scott defending our title against two of the toughest SOBs in WCE…
James: And of course, the main event is where I, James DeathTrap Whitman, face off against World’s Most Dangerous man Ken Forte, with the WCE World Heavyweight Title on the line.
Scott: Right. So now that you know the who, the what, and the where... you better be there.
James: Correct, sir. This public service announcement has been brought to you by the JESTers. See ya at the bash!
The screen fades into
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g171/Slicerino/wceHBppvlogo2.gif