Dan Stown
03-24-2008, 04:48 AM
Queens of the Stone Age's "The Sky is Fallin" starts to play. 37 seconds into the song, Dan Stown and Natasha Stone emerge.
YouTube - Queens of The Stone Age The Sky is Fallin'
Daniels: Wow, Natasha is still hot!
Styles: No doubt about that but look at the clean cut Dan Stown! This is a real sight!
http://i33.photobucket.com/albums/d89/D_Stown/hugh_jackman_92.jpg
Dan and Natasha walk out side by side. Dan has his signature garbage can in hand. They step into the ring as the music stops and he grabs the mic from his coat jacket.
Dan Stown: It feels good, damn good to be back in this ring. Its been 6 months since I've been in this ring. How many of you have missed me?
*Entire crowd boos*
Dan Stown: Ah well, that answers if you worthless pieces of garbage remember me. But yes, I am back and I am better than ever. But before I get into any details, since I have brought up garbage...you may notice my trademark garbage can. Inside of the can is a gallon of gasoline and the Stown signature tack filled steel chair.
Stown grabs each object and shows them to the crowd as he speaks about each object.
Ahhh, memories. Oh boy the memories I have with these beloved objects. Natasha can you help me out here.
Natasha takes the cap of the gasoline gallon and starts pouring it in the can...and lits it on fire.
You see ladies and gentlemen, the objects you just saw me hold are now a thing of the past. Those objects were really good to me...especially my chair but as you can tell from my clean cut apperance...I am a changed man. Gone are long sideburns and a little too long hair. Gone is the old entrance song of Social Distortion' s 1945.
You might be asking yourself...
*Why the changes Dan Stown?*
*What have you been doing since you lost the Intercontinental Title back in September?*
*Why have you come back?*
Do not fret my friends, all your worries and questions will be answered in due time. But before I speak about these topics, I have to say how damn good Natasha Stone is looking. I mean, just wow. What a fucking knock-out!
http://a795.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/49/l_6d8bf20c1585ef1a73567e6f604c36ea.jpg
Dan and Natasha start making out as the crowd starts booing. Natasha grabs the mic after the make out session.
Natasha Stone: You people wanna know why you are booing? Its because you are jealous of us! Jealous of the sexy Dan Stown and me! You people are fat and pathetic. You envy the two of us! So instead of booing, you should keep your fat filthy mouth quiet as you privileged to witness two pieces of beauty have a moment. The nerve of you people!
Dan Stown: Well, I couldn't have said that any better if I wanted too! Looks, brains, and a couple of other things which I will not mention to these lazy sacks of s*it. Where was I again?
Natasha Stone: I believe you were going to tell these people about the changes they see...
Dan Stown: Thank you babe. Yes, even *you* retards can hear the difference of intro music, the new look and you just witnessed history as I burned my past.
The last time you people saw me back in September, a Mr. Eddie Freeze lit me on fire.
You people are expecting me to go on a rant now on Eddie Freeze? Well, thats just not going to happen. You see people, I THANK Eddie Freeze for doing what he did.
I'll admit losing the Intercontinental Championship was hard on me. Sure didn't help I was in the hospital with second degree burns. But I was only in the hospital for 2 weeks. And no, I know all you stupid sons of bitches think second degree burngs are life threating but they are not. Unlike murders, the higher the degree with burns...the worst. Meaning, third degree burns are worst and than first degree. You dumb Canadians get it?
Crowd starts yelling asshole.
I take that as a complement so go ahead and waste your breath. I spent the rest of my time off reinventing myself. Hence the new music, new look, and throwing away my past. I have traveled and trained throughout the world. I am in the best shape of my entire life! My body fat is down to 3.4%. That is bodybuilding levels! That is as perfect as perfect gets not that I was a fat boy when I was walking around at 6% the last time you saw me.
I've been keeping up with WCE since I've been gone. Plenty of things have changed but the more things change, the more they stay the same.
I am back into a Intercontinental Title match much to my surprise! Quite honestly, I am surprised that I will be placed into a title match and walk out with the title again. Though, I can't really blame the bookers since the Intercontinental Title as become a joke since it left my waist. How many title changes have there been? 5, 6? I can't even keep up with it.
Oh, one more and the most important change. I didn't come back to win titles. If that happens, it happens. Gone are the days of Dan Stown demanding title shots. Gone are the days of Dan Stown demanding anything. The Dan Stown you see before you is going to prove against anyone that he is truly THE ICON OF ICONS!!! After I beat Orion, I will accept open challengers! Meaning, if you think you have a chance in hell of beating me, try me but you will look like a fool. I don't care its a former or reigning world champion or a newly signed Joe, I will beat anyone and everyone in this very ring.
Speaking of Orion, you should start getting ready to let go of that title. I mean, title match or not...there is no way I'm going to lose my first match back. Since this is a title match, you better bring your A game. Not that is going to make a real difference as you will be the first example of the new and improved Dan Stown. So Orion, when we met in the ring. I will shake your hand and I will beat you fair and square. I will be the victor and for this match, I will walk out the 2 time Intercontinental Champion. Hopefully you and the other names that have held the title since yours truly haven't tarnished the title as what happen with the now debunked European Title.
So go watch my old matches Orion but you will be in the ring with a much improved Dan Stown. I realize talk is cheap and I just said A LOT but one thing that hasn't changed is that I am a winner and I have always been a man of my words.
To recap, Orion is going to lose his title in our match right in the center of this ring in a clean tough fought match. I will show to the world that I am not the same Dan Stown they saw back in 2007. Whether you people want me back or not, I'm back.
WHETHER YOU LIKE IT!!! OR I GIVE A DAMN!
YouTube - Queens of The Stone Age The Sky is Fallin'
Daniels: Wow, Natasha is still hot!
Styles: No doubt about that but look at the clean cut Dan Stown! This is a real sight!
http://i33.photobucket.com/albums/d89/D_Stown/hugh_jackman_92.jpg
Dan and Natasha walk out side by side. Dan has his signature garbage can in hand. They step into the ring as the music stops and he grabs the mic from his coat jacket.
Dan Stown: It feels good, damn good to be back in this ring. Its been 6 months since I've been in this ring. How many of you have missed me?
*Entire crowd boos*
Dan Stown: Ah well, that answers if you worthless pieces of garbage remember me. But yes, I am back and I am better than ever. But before I get into any details, since I have brought up garbage...you may notice my trademark garbage can. Inside of the can is a gallon of gasoline and the Stown signature tack filled steel chair.
Stown grabs each object and shows them to the crowd as he speaks about each object.
Ahhh, memories. Oh boy the memories I have with these beloved objects. Natasha can you help me out here.
Natasha takes the cap of the gasoline gallon and starts pouring it in the can...and lits it on fire.
You see ladies and gentlemen, the objects you just saw me hold are now a thing of the past. Those objects were really good to me...especially my chair but as you can tell from my clean cut apperance...I am a changed man. Gone are long sideburns and a little too long hair. Gone is the old entrance song of Social Distortion' s 1945.
You might be asking yourself...
*Why the changes Dan Stown?*
*What have you been doing since you lost the Intercontinental Title back in September?*
*Why have you come back?*
Do not fret my friends, all your worries and questions will be answered in due time. But before I speak about these topics, I have to say how damn good Natasha Stone is looking. I mean, just wow. What a fucking knock-out!
http://a795.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/49/l_6d8bf20c1585ef1a73567e6f604c36ea.jpg
Dan and Natasha start making out as the crowd starts booing. Natasha grabs the mic after the make out session.
Natasha Stone: You people wanna know why you are booing? Its because you are jealous of us! Jealous of the sexy Dan Stown and me! You people are fat and pathetic. You envy the two of us! So instead of booing, you should keep your fat filthy mouth quiet as you privileged to witness two pieces of beauty have a moment. The nerve of you people!
Dan Stown: Well, I couldn't have said that any better if I wanted too! Looks, brains, and a couple of other things which I will not mention to these lazy sacks of s*it. Where was I again?
Natasha Stone: I believe you were going to tell these people about the changes they see...
Dan Stown: Thank you babe. Yes, even *you* retards can hear the difference of intro music, the new look and you just witnessed history as I burned my past.
The last time you people saw me back in September, a Mr. Eddie Freeze lit me on fire.
You people are expecting me to go on a rant now on Eddie Freeze? Well, thats just not going to happen. You see people, I THANK Eddie Freeze for doing what he did.
I'll admit losing the Intercontinental Championship was hard on me. Sure didn't help I was in the hospital with second degree burns. But I was only in the hospital for 2 weeks. And no, I know all you stupid sons of bitches think second degree burngs are life threating but they are not. Unlike murders, the higher the degree with burns...the worst. Meaning, third degree burns are worst and than first degree. You dumb Canadians get it?
Crowd starts yelling asshole.
I take that as a complement so go ahead and waste your breath. I spent the rest of my time off reinventing myself. Hence the new music, new look, and throwing away my past. I have traveled and trained throughout the world. I am in the best shape of my entire life! My body fat is down to 3.4%. That is bodybuilding levels! That is as perfect as perfect gets not that I was a fat boy when I was walking around at 6% the last time you saw me.
I've been keeping up with WCE since I've been gone. Plenty of things have changed but the more things change, the more they stay the same.
I am back into a Intercontinental Title match much to my surprise! Quite honestly, I am surprised that I will be placed into a title match and walk out with the title again. Though, I can't really blame the bookers since the Intercontinental Title as become a joke since it left my waist. How many title changes have there been? 5, 6? I can't even keep up with it.
Oh, one more and the most important change. I didn't come back to win titles. If that happens, it happens. Gone are the days of Dan Stown demanding title shots. Gone are the days of Dan Stown demanding anything. The Dan Stown you see before you is going to prove against anyone that he is truly THE ICON OF ICONS!!! After I beat Orion, I will accept open challengers! Meaning, if you think you have a chance in hell of beating me, try me but you will look like a fool. I don't care its a former or reigning world champion or a newly signed Joe, I will beat anyone and everyone in this very ring.
Speaking of Orion, you should start getting ready to let go of that title. I mean, title match or not...there is no way I'm going to lose my first match back. Since this is a title match, you better bring your A game. Not that is going to make a real difference as you will be the first example of the new and improved Dan Stown. So Orion, when we met in the ring. I will shake your hand and I will beat you fair and square. I will be the victor and for this match, I will walk out the 2 time Intercontinental Champion. Hopefully you and the other names that have held the title since yours truly haven't tarnished the title as what happen with the now debunked European Title.
So go watch my old matches Orion but you will be in the ring with a much improved Dan Stown. I realize talk is cheap and I just said A LOT but one thing that hasn't changed is that I am a winner and I have always been a man of my words.
To recap, Orion is going to lose his title in our match right in the center of this ring in a clean tough fought match. I will show to the world that I am not the same Dan Stown they saw back in 2007. Whether you people want me back or not, I'm back.
WHETHER YOU LIKE IT!!! OR I GIVE A DAMN!